Pop Quiz:
Please answer all the questions. Sign your name in the upper right-hand corner, sharpen a No. 2 pencil and begin. This will not be graded on a curve.
Why hasn’t anyone seen Jake Tapper’s new book on Trump the Dementia/Incontinency Presidency.
For the Epsteinth time, has anyone seen those pesky Epstein files? No? I didn’t think so.
Why did several oil executives say after they fled the “Trump Oil Meeting” that the “room smelled foul” and Trump gives off an odor “like rotting roast beef”? What’z up wit dat? Please describe any of his medical issues in detail.
Why did the White House ban this Canadian video from being played by anyone in the White House?
Was this video funny or fucking beyond scary accurate.”
Why didn’t anyone listen to me when, at the beginning of his 2016 term, I said Donald Trump’s ambition was to destroy US democracy and install himself as a dictator? Please show your work and apologize to me profusely.
Why is Paul Krugman 4,332,889,231 times smarter than everyone in the White House put together?
Is Greenland our 51st state or is Venezuela?
Why is Robert Reich the shittiest cartoonist in the history of the world?
I still haven’t seen those Epstein files. Does anyone reading this have them? You will get extra credit if you find them and bring them to class.
Is Lil’ Marco tall enough to be El Presidente of Cuba? Isn’t there a “You must be taller than this to run this country” requirement over there?
Is Sean Hannity made out of a block of cheese or Spam?
Is Trump rotting from the inside out or the outside in?
Who rang the doorbell and left a giant, orange, incontinent, flaming bag of dog poop on America’s front porch?
Do you read a magazine front to back or back to front? (Tip: There is only one correct answer.)
During his ridiculous interview with Krusty Gnome, why didn’t Jake Tapper lean in and hiss, “Answer the question you lying whore of moral contamination?” Pick one: He’s a goddamned coward | He pretends to be a journalist | He hopes the Trump Administration will hire him | All three.
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If an illegally appointed gang of ICE-cold killers can shoot a peaceful, unarmed, smiling, woman in her car trying to get around blocked traffic and then call her a “fucking bitch”, can they shoot you if you’re not smiling?
Welcome to Martial Law, people.
