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It’s a Nobel medal, a symbol of the honor, not the honor itself. Only a vain, insecure fool would imagine that blackmailing someone into handing their medal over adds to his stature.
Also, this is not an insurrection:
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HINDSIGHT - WRITE SOMETHING WORTH READING ABOUT OR DO SOMETHING WORTH WRITING ABOUT
Friday, January 16, 2026
Neediest dipshit ever gets Nobel Participation Trophy
oh, my sweet lord. how clownfuckingly pathetic is this? Venezuelan opposition leader María Corina Machado visited the Oval Bordello yesterday, and did the thing we all feared she’d do — she forked over her Nobel Peace Prize. she set it right into Preznit Fuckwit’s stubby little fingers. look at this smug bastard. he truly believes he actually won something. he has no idea the entire world is laughing at how small and needy he is. that bauble he’s grasping is no longer the Nobel Peace Prize. it’s now the Nobel Diapershittingest Buffoon Prize. the Nobel Committee has made it crystal clear that it doesn’t matter who possesses the prize — María Machado will eternally be the actual Nobel laureate, and Donny will just be a thirsty fucking loser.
but you know that stupid things like facts aren’t going to stop Donny from strutting about, and never shutting the fuck up about how he ‘won’ the prize.
it’s all so eternally embarrassing. aren’t you tired of watching Donny whine incessantly until he inevitably gets his way? he’s like a child having a meltdown in a supermarket because was told he can’t have candy — and the entire world is his beleaguered parent.
wanna peace prize! wanna peace prize! wannit! wannit! and, eventually, the parent gives in, just to have a moment of peace and quiet. fine. have your goddamned prize. now please just shut the fuck up. so, what did Machado imagine she was going to get out of the deal? did she think she was going to have Donny’s backing her quest to lead Venezuela? I hate to tell you this, María — but it looks like that shit ain’t gonna fly.  reporter: “is it still the president’s assessment that it would be very hard for Ms. Machado to lead Venezuela? because he said she lacks the respect and support in that country.” Karoline Lie-vitt: “I think the president’s assessment that you just pointed out was based on realities on the ground. it was a realistic assessment based on what the president was reading and hearing from his advisors and national security team and at this moment in time, his opinion on that matter has not changed.” current events bear this out. at the same time Machado was in the White House, CIA director John Ratcliffe was down in Venezuela, currying favor with the Maduro loyalists now running the country.
Donny doesn’t need María Corina Machado to help him steal Venezuela’s oil — and that’s all he wants. he doesn’t give a fuck that Maduro’s government is still oppressing the shit out of the Venezuelan people. María Machado can stick all her fancy-shmancy talk about human rights where the sun don’t shine. Donny isn’t listening. so what did Marîa actually get? this: swag.
she got a gift bag. enjoy your autographed ‘TRUMP 2028’ hat, María. I hope it was worth giving away your Peace Prize. Machado got played, just like everybody who thinks they’re going somehow get an even exchange out of Donny gets played. it never happens. there’s no such thing as a ‘win-win’ deal in Donnyland. someone has to come out on the losing side, and Donny’s a pathological sadist who enjoys stringing people along, only to fuck them over in the end. hey, did you know that Machado’s gifting of the Peace Prize is not without historical precedent? there actually is one instance of someone handing their prize to a foreign leader. you know who got that prize, don’t you? of course you do — because the answer is always THE FUCKING NAZIS.
you’re in great company, Donny. now, can someone please tell me — what the fuck is this?
what in the world is this demented old coot blithering about? a BOARD OF PEACE? to do what? oh, how lovely. the chaos-addicted maniac who kidnapped Maduro, is threatening to fuck Greenland’s shit, and who is setting his own personal gestapo loose to kill and maim Americans, he’s cooked up some cockamamie BOARD OF PEACE — as one does, when one is a delusional fucking lunatic. tell me about all these GREAT and PRESTIGIOUS board members — are they big and strong, with tears in their eyes? are they in the room with us right now? I can’t wait to find out who’s on this board. Joseph Goebbels? Genghis Khan? Vlad the Impaler? you know exactly where Donny’s going with this peace board — he’s going to invent his own personal peace prize and award it to himself. you can put money on it. the Nobel Diapershittingest Buffoon Prize wasn’t the only gift given to Donny yesterday. after meeting with Machado, Donny hosted the Florida Panthers, winners of the 2025 Stanley Cup. the Panthers presented him with a golden hockey stick — because of course they did. you can never go wrong flattering Donny with some gaudy gold-plated crap.
maybe Donny will let the Panthers run Venezuela now. before you watch this next clip, answer me this: why the fuck are the Florida Panthers all dressed like Dear Leader? look at them, in their stupid blue suits and red ties. I had no idea that the entire team was made up of MAGAfied cultists. no wonder Florida’s official motto is The Dumbfuck State.  “good looking people. young, beautiful people. I hate them. you hate standing here with all this, uh, this power behind you. but I got power too. it's called the United States military. I don't care.” what a supreme fucking asshole. I’ll bet Donny really does hate standing next to people who are stronger, better looking, and more accomplished than he is. actual winners, who don’t have to whine about not getting a prize. ‘I got power, it’s called the military.’ oh, do please fuck straight off. this isn’t how confident leaders talk. this is how insecure weaklings talk. this is how a runty little banty rooster whose tyrant Klansman father told him he would always be a piece-of-shit loser talks. here’s a fun thing you can do to make current events a little more tolerable: every time Donny boasts about one of his imaginary accomplishments, just add ‘in my pants’ to the end of it. I have a golden hockey stick. in my pants. I stopped eight wars. in my pants. I won the peace prize. in my pants. I won the 2020 election. in my pants. I have an army. in my pants. I have a Board of Peace. in my pants. I lowered the price of gas. in my pants. now, that last one I can believe. Donny’s pungent ass music has always been free for the taking.
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MILES TAYLOR
I talked Trump out of invoking the Insurrection Act. He'll do it this time — but we can stop him.America needs to prepare for the coming constitutional crisis. However, it's not hopeless. It's time to go on legal offense.
Donald Trump’s desire to invoke one of the presidency’s most extraordinary, emergency powers is ten years in the making. I believe he will do it. And I believe we have real options to fight back.As news outlets reported this week, the White House is openly threatening to deploy U.S. troops into Minnesota under the Insurrection Act after protests erupted following the killing of Renee Nicole Good by an ICE agent. Federal forces have already flooded Minneapolis. The president is now warning that unless the state “stops the professional agitators and insurrectionists,” he will send in the military using one of his most extraordinary powers. Contrary to the analysis of many pundits, this isn’t bluster. It’s the culmination of a nearly ten-year fixation I witnessed firsthand inside Donald Trump’s first administration. Last night I went on Jen Psaki’s show on MSNOW to explain why this moment has been coming for a decade — and why Trump has always wanted to test the outer limits of his “apex” powers.  We’ve been here before. In fact, I watched Trump nearly invoke the Act — and talked him out of it.I’ve written repeatedly about the Insurrection Act because I saw how dangerously close we came to it during Trump’s first term. Indeed, it was the very first thing I disclosed when I first came forward against the president ahead of his re-election campaign. In 2019, while I was chief of staff at the Department of Homeland Security, Trump nearly used the Act to dramatically militarize the Southern Border, where he’d openly mused about repelling migrants by force, i.e. shooting them. I got a phone call that tipped me off. Trump had just watched cable news footage of a migrant caravan approaching the Southern Border, and he was furious. Aides alerted me that he wanted to announce in his State of the Union address that he was sending the military to take over border security and to override any objection, law, or court. Our lawyers told us this was madness. This didn’t rise to the level of a “foreign invasion.” Not even close. I agreed. What’s more, we feared that if he did this at the border, it would be a slippery slope: he’d send the military anywhere in the country that he wasn’t getting his way. When the Secretary and I got to the White House, the President was practicing his speech in the Map Room. He greeted us with a grin, as if unable to hide his excitement at preparing to exercise a power he’d been told was one of the “break glass” emergency authorities of the presidency. We immediately set about convincing him this was the “wrong time” to do such a thing and the “wrong circumstances.” What followed was a torturous night of ping pong. We enlisted the White House lawyers to help us persuade the boss. We called the Secretary of State. We phoned colleagues in the Government of Mexico to see what more they could do to tamp down the caravan. And when we persuaded him the situation was under control — and couldn’t possibly warrant the use of powers meant for wartime — he eventually (and begrudgingly) relented. But after that moment, it was clear: he would try again. In fact, he never let go of the idea. On other occasions in conversations with us, he referred almost wistfully to the Insurrection Act as his “magical authorities.” He believed — and still believes — that Article II of the U.S. Constitution allows him to do “whatever I want as President.” Since returning to office, Trump has been trying to foment an “insurrection” or “rebellion” to justify emergency action.Last year I warned repeatedly that Donald Trump was edging toward this moment. He began experimenting in Los Angeles, pushing troops beyond their lawful support roles, daring the courts to stop him. The very day he announced he was sending the Marines into California last June, I wrote this:
That’s almost exactly what has happened since (including the White House putting in place measures to designate opposition groups and individuals as “domestic terrorists” and to charge his opponents with fake crimes). They tried to create the circumstances that would justify an invocation. They probed Los Angeles. They probed Chicago. They probed Washington, D.C. They probed Portland. In each case, the opposition refused to play the role Trump and Stephen Miller wrote for them. Protests were loud but largely peaceful. And local officials kept order, meaning that suddenly invoking the Insurrection Act would not have passed the laugh test. What’s more, the courts shot down those National Guard and troop deployments. From California to Washington, D.C., federal judges ruled that the president’s actions were flat-out unconstitutional. On New Year’s Eve, Trump quietly and ruefully said he was withdrawing the National Guard — but hinted ominously at what was to come. Perversely, those rulings only accelerated his interest in the Insurrection Act, the one statute that could give him a colorable excuse to send the military back in and make it harder for the courts to constrain him. Here’s why Minnesota might be different.Knowing these people, I strongly suspect the Trump administration studied the map of American unrest the way a fire inspector studies old burn scars on a building’s walls. That’s why cities with a big protest history (LA, DC, Chicago, Portland) were up first. But they didn’t deliver. Then, White House aides remembered 2020. Specifically, I imagine they recalled how the George Floyd protests in Minneapolis became a national symbol at the end of Trump’s first term, and they knew it could be a potential powder keg. So they poured in thousands of federal agents, under the flimsy excuse that kindergartens run by Somali-Americans were rife with fraud — as if that’s the type of national security threat that requires shock troops instead of investigative accountants. The tension rose the past few weeks, by design. Then an ICE agent shot and killed Renee Nicole Good. While I don’t believe her death was part of some scripted plot, the confrontational posture made such a tragedy more likely. Now the White House is gathering the visuals it was hoping for. They’re asking ICE officers to grab street footage for them, too, in an effort to document clashes, grieving crowds, and a state under pressure. Trump’s message is predictable and pre-planned: Nothing can fix this but the U.S. military. Trump’s use of the Insurrection Act would surely be illegal. Here are a few ways I think we can stop him.The Insurrection Act was written in 1807 to repel invasions and suppress genuine rebellions. It is meant to be a last resort when states cannot protect constitutional rights or enforce federal law. Minnesota does not meet that standard, by any stretch of the imagination. The state retains full control of its own National Guard, local police and courts are functioning, there’s no observable “insurrection” in sight. In fact, using the Act there would invert its purpose. The federal government would be deploying troops against a state that is capable of maintaining order, simply because the president dislikes its politics. Courts should absolutely strike this down. But Trump has never treated the law as a guardrail, and he’s counting on the fact that federal courts will be slow to respond. Despair is exactly what the White House wants. However, there are practical, powerful steps federal, state, and local leaders can take to check Trump’s wayward use of his presidential power if he invokes the Act. First, Minnesota should sue and strip away the pretext. The governor and attorney general could seek a declaratory judgment that the Insurrection Act’s conditions are not met and that the state retains primary authority over public safety. Minnesota should simultaneously build the factual record: activated National Guard units under state control, mutual-aid agreements, functioning courts, and certifications from law-enforcement leaders that order can be maintained. A formal declaration of capacity would gut Trump’s claim that only the U.S. military can restore peace. Second, other states MUST move together. It’s time for the governors to have an emergency summit. Illinois, California, Oregon, and others should file parallel briefs stating they will not consent to federal military policing within their borders and will challenge any similar deployment. Governors should convene in emergency session to adopt a joint compact defending federalism and coordinate Guard resources so no state can be isolated and bullied. Unity is a legal shield and a political deterrent, and we are LONG overdue for the governors to come together to show that. Third, Congress must put the military on notice, immediately. Members should announce they will open Congressional investigations into any manifestly unlawful orders issued under a sham invocation of the Act, with inspectors general requests and committee subpoenas ready to go. Uniformed leaders need to hear, before a single deployment, that obedience to manifestly illegal commands carries personal and institutional consequences. This is not intimidation; it’s a reminder of their oath to the Constitution. Fourth, impeachment must begin the moment he acts. Even if today’s GOP majority in the House blocks impeachment proceedings, opposition Members of Congress should file articles of impeachment and create the constitutional record that courts and future Congresses will rely upon. Silence would be treated as acquiescence. And if Democrats retake Congress, those proceedings can and must resume where they left off. Donald Trump fears impeachment if he loses the midterms, and he should. Fifth — and most importantly — this would be a moment for mass civic resistance. If U.S. troops are sent against an American state, the response must be the largest peaceful mobilization in our history. By that, I mean coordinated marches in every state capital and cities large and small, labor walkouts, faith leaders in the streets, veterans standing between soldiers and citizens, mayors opening city halls for lawful assembly, and more. Trump is portraying the opposition as “terrorists” and “insurrectionists”; millions of calm Americans can shatter that illusion overnight. This is not an exhaustive list. There’s a great deal more that can be done. And in the coming days and weeks, those options will be fleshed out. What we cannot do, though, is be lulled into a false sense of comfort that this is another Trump “joke” and not the real thing. We have to be ready. Like I’ve said, again and again, Trump has been rehearsing this play for a decade. I watched the dress rehearsals. This time he believes the stage is set. But it isn’t, unless we surrender it to him. The Constitution still works when Americans use it, and the United States won’t become a despotism unless we allow it to be one. Before that ever happens, we have options to fight back — lawfully, peacefully, and defiantly. Your friend, in defiance,
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